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Out To Pastor
The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and her wonderful husband celebrate 53 years of marital bliss this year. What an accomplishment.
It does not seem possible that we have been married 53 years. After all, we do not look that old! At least she does not.
It is amazing how time flies; if you are like me, you do not even pay attention to it. Now that I am just past the 70-year mark, things seem to be going faster than ever. I can wake up in the morning and it does not take long for me to be ready to go back to bed. Where does all this time go? I think I want a refund.
I have come to understand that no matter how things change, they always remain the same. Just because my age has changed does not mean anything else about me has changed. I am still the same person The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage married 53 years ago. I have no plans to change.
As far as I know, she has not changed either. And I am unanimous in that.
Down through the years of our marital Showboat adventure, The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage has often asked me, “What is wrong with you? Are you crazy or what?”
That has not changed since the beginning of our journey. I have been crazy from the beginning, and I still am, and I have no expectation of changing. If I am going to change, I would like to know what she means by the phrase “or what?”
The only thing that has not changed is my understanding of everything that The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage says. To this day, I do not know what her meaning of the word “crazy” is. When she asks me if I was crazy, I was not sure what she is asking. I just go along with her idea. What else can I do?
Looking back over my life, especially the 53 years of our marriage, I can see a few moments of me being crazy. But I do not see anything wrong with being crazy. In fact, being crazy has been the real fun in my life. Why can I not be crazy once in a while?
I am sure my definition of crazy and her definition of crazy do not share the same dining room table.
For one, crazy means that I do not take things very seriously. That has been helpful over the years, and I can verify that. It helps me release stress.
Of course, I take many things in life seriously, but the ones that I do not take seriously are important to me. That is the area of my crazyitis. I have a hard time picking which ones are crazy and which ones are not.
The real difference between The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and me is that she takes everything seriously. I, on the other side of the room, do not take everything seriously. Of course, there are sometimes, I must admit, I take the wrong thing not too seriously. That is what really gets me into trouble.
I always think of the Abe Lincoln joke, where his wife asks him, “Does this dress make me look fat?”
To be serious about that question is a lifesaver. However, not to be serious about that question can get a person into deep trouble. I know, I have been there.
One time, The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage bought a new dress, brought it home, put it on, and came out to where I was sitting and asked me, “What do you think about this new dress of mine?”
I was not too serious at the moment, so I looked up at her and said, “I don’t think I could wear that dress anywhere and get away with it.”
Before I even finished that sentence, I knew I was in trouble.
“What?” she said, “You think you can wear one of my dresses?”
Throughout our marital bliss, I have often dug a hole so deep that I could not get out, yet I kept digging.
I thought I was just joking, but she did not think it was a joke.
Looking at her, I laughed and said, “Oh, my dear, I was just joking.”
I thought I had gotten out of that hole, but I was wrong.
“So,” she said sarcastically, “you think my dresses are jokes.”
It was at this level that I realized this was not very funny. I may be crazy, but this was not the time to be crazy. If only I could learn how to control being crazy.
I have tried through the years to work on my crazyitis, but I do not think I have worked hard enough because I have not seen any improvement on my side of the kitchen table.
My problem is that I do not hear very well. Actually, I do hear; I just am not listening. And boy, is there a difference there.
Our 53-year marital journey has been great. I credit that success to one of my favorite verses in the Bible. Amos 3:3, “Can two walk together, except they be agreed?”
Throughout our journey, we have agreed on more things than we disagreed on. In fact, the longer we live together, the less we seem to disagree. That is unity.
We are headed in the same direction although, sometimes I am looking out the right window and she is looking out her left window. The destination is what really matters. And that we totally agree on.
